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There’s something superficially relieving about posting your deepest thoughts and ponderings onto a blog all the while hiding behind the veil of anonymity. Even as I write this I’m hesitant to go ahead and click the Save button - as if all my privy and utmost intimate thoughts are suddenly out in the open, waiting to be dissected and analysed beyond their original meaning by anyone with a little spare time on their hands; I suppose that’s the flipside of having a blog.
It’s Saturday.. early.. yet I feel like it’s a Monday morning. My eyes don’t want to stay open a moment longer. My head feels light, yet heavy. What a juxtaposition for you, my wonderful reader. I can’t remember names or things I want to do. I can’t hold my attention on things. I can’t seem to concentrate. Little transparent things flutter and flow before my eyes. Little sparkling lights (you’re pissed, Duncan). The world feels dark and murky. My heartbeat is heavy, time to arrange a visit to the Doctor to get some Codeine again! Oh Dr Langley, you incoherent couldnt-give-a-toss wanker.
I’ve posted my thoughts on my personal friendships, my life and where I feel I’m (not) going one time too many; I daren’t make the same mistake again. A truly wanton waste of time and energy. As an aside, who invented that word - daren’t? What a ludicrous expression it is; why use daren’t when “must not” will suffice anyway?
In closure, props to the people who steal my posts and pass them off as their own on their MySpace blogs. I wont give them linkjuice by highlighting them here, but you know who you are. I suppose that’s some small comfort to me: a huge smack in the face that my blog is “working” and people actually give a toss.
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